Headache and works and life

About thirty minutes ago, I was writing my blog when my computer died on me. The blog started with something like this:

Here I am sitting, trying to breathe through my stuffed nose... bla bla bla..

It was the beginning of another sobering episode of my life recorded in this blog. Thankfully, about 10 mins ago I found something to laugh at... I had not laughed that hard... It's reducing headache, which has accompanied me all day...

Then here I am in a more lightened mood... trying to convey what my mind wants to say...

Let list words that usually stressing me out:

1. Miss/ Long
I dont reckon that I miss or long for anyone currently. My recent pasts have popped up out of nowhere and befriended me. They did make me merry, impermanently though... Things will just remain the same, regardless how I've wanted to change it...They're million miles away, I am here. They pursue their dreams, I am busy make a living and busy to seek for what I want.

2. Future
Yes, I am a bit freaking out with the reality. Reality wants to suck me in. Will the place that I have always dreamed of be the place where I will reside in the future? Have I made the right decision? Had I tried hard enough?

3. Some other personal things
That includes everything that I have kept in private for love sake. This, I truly realize have played the largest part for my headache lately.

4. Friends
Gosh! I havent found a friend whom I can just share stories with... I am a bit cautious. Thanks to my friendship history. I know some people are sincerely kind but it is just hard for me sometimes to just letting myself go.
However, I would not complain any further about this as I have my very very best mates around the world, who have been there for me even they're million miles away...

There, I am a bit unfocus... pardon that. My headache is just returning

Alright, I am just going to leave it here...