The Uncertainty

It is amazing how you could lose your words when you are required to write about topics that have always been the center of your blog. While ofcourse in some other times, you've always tried to find a way to sneak in and write in your blog even when your boss has sent you a kindly reminder for not going online for non-work-purposes.

It is always the story, isnt it?

You would think that you're prepared for everything in life. But when such opportunity like writing about you're passionate about present or when your past decided to add you in Blackberry messenger, your brain starts to question your ability to cope with that.

Yes it certainly is challenging. It is life's character that always prefers uncertainty that sometimes catches you off guard.

Thus, you can blame the uncertainty for bringing your past back to you. Unfortunately, it is also the same thing that took your dream away seven years ago.

Seven years apart and ofcourse the uncertainty caught off you guard with your past replying, "It has been too long since we last met, so in the end, there is nothing to miss," when you messaged "I miss you"

See, that same thing "the uncertainty" has just dragged you down just as fast as it lifted you up .

You just can never be too certain.

But at least there's always that "Haha. I even forgot that we ever met" kind of answer.

Ah new guy, same dick!

Its an awakening call. It feels like someone has punched my heart, in the morning. Just what I was wishing for.

Trying to think of what is a better word for broken heart, but instead I could only find a fool and misery to substitute the words.

I wasn't a foolish, he did offer me a romance. I wasn't in misery, he had me merry.

But this morning, these two words are sounding louder than ever.

It is never easy but I guess I am used to it. I'm just hoping that I'm immune to the pain. Therefore in the future, there is no memory lane that will hold me back from taking a leap to fall in love.

I'm used to this, I keep reminding myself. But I suppose, this tiny hear ache is playing dominantly in my thoughts.

Move on, oh how I just hate that word! Can I just move on with you? A little part of my heart screams to give us another chance...

Damn, you've even charmed my heart...

But no. This is the time like any other time for me to keep my head up and say, "I will be fine" and inhale my freedom that I once surrendered to you.

Life is life and I am picking up this broken pieces of my heart.