A thing that makes me mortified...

Do I really have problem with commitment?

Or was it only in the end...in the back of my mind, they werent the ones whom I am looking for?

But my question really is... who am I looking for?

I keep saying that I want somebody who'd sacrifice even their life for me... and I keep telling myself that I havent found anyone qualified...

well, as I am writing this... I just realized that, I actually had met the 'unfortunate' people who thought that I was the center of their happiness and worth fighting for...

And as you know now.. I am still complaining about not finding one!

When I told my friends, jokingly, that I have problems with commitment...I was unsure if that really was my problem... 'til this moment when I started to believe that I might have problems with commitment..

well here is the thing... I do wanna have a one serious relationship with somebody who truly loves me... (who doesnt?!)

But is it normal that I keep running away everytime I hear the alarm of commitment sounding?

SHIT!

Seriously... I can go insane!

I, once, watched Oprah show which was discussing about how women usually in love with the bad guys because actually they think that they dont deserve the Good ones...

Well... at first, I thought... bad guys? of course..! they usually look Hotter and who wants a boring life anyway when you certainly can have a very dynamic life

and now...



--to be continued--