Let's get married... or Let shall not...

Dreams dreams dreams...

What else do I want eh?! Life favors me lately (Thank You GOD)... got one more job for the spring break next week... which undoubtely will make me really tired in the end of the week... but oh well, I need the money... and ill suck it up

My birthday is only 2 days to go... and yes I am nervous...

I know its like nothing to be nervous about, however... realizing that I have to say bye to my glorious 2oth years, kinda hit me that... darn I am old!

So talking about my upcoming birthday and stuff... My dearly beloved PAPA... sent me an e-mail, which says:

Semoga dapet jodoh yang terbaik. (amin)

Yea... it was a nice wish coming from my father. Nothing's wrong with it, however, ( I probably over analyze it) I was kinda laughing at it.

I meant, it doesnt mean I dont want a good soulmate or whatever you want to call that, but... I am still 21! And... I think that wish would be more suit for my 25th birthday wish. Dont you think so?

Don't get me wrong... I wanna have a boyfriend... however, its kinda not in my priority list at this moment.

I dont even know what I want for God sake!

Even at this very second, I am not even sure how my feeling is toward my crushes, whom btw one of them was having 'up and personal' conversation with me today.

Well, my point is... I just hope that...my father didnt mean to rush me and stuff, into relationship... I know that he wont, and knowing him, he barely even made any good comment about the guys whom I was involved with!

I remember I told my parents one time that...

No matter how old I will be... please never rush me into any marriage if I do not want to...

AND... they agreed...

also about whomever I am married to...

My papa one time told me if he didnt want me to get marry with any foreigners... and thats because he doesnt want me to leave him forever...

While my mother said... that I could get marry with anyone I want, because I will be the one who live my life.... (thats just great....)--- making feel lots worse if I ever made mistake...LOL

To be honest,

I dont see myself marrying any foreigners... (I want to but..), its funny, because I see myself to be wedded by an Indonesian...

I dont know... I really dont know... its just a bit too much for me to think about it at this moment...

anyhow... whatever happen... happen!

and I just always pray to Alloh to always guide me along the way... thats all I want... at least for now..