A day is just a day... or so I thought.

A friend of mine says, "you know why you're upset, you just dont want to admit it". I insist, "No, I really dont know"

Hours later, here I am writing this blog. I started to doubt my answer,
"Maybe he is precise. I am upset by the things, which I dont want to acknowledge."
I ponder, if acknowledging the source of this "turbulance feeling" could ever change the situation.
Unfortunately, I do not believe so.
What would be good for setting me free if it did not change anything, Not even a single thing.
I want to cry. I do.
But I always lost in my own tears.
They always say, "You're very brave"
I used to think that I was... but somehow, I could only find fears.
They always say, "You're not alone"
I used to think that I wasn't... but somehow, I couldnt find any familiar faces.
I want to return to where I was.
But the world seems to be cruel to me.
And at this very moment, those faces are appearing.
They are the reasons why I am at where I am right now.
I recall, I admitted to him, "the worst feeling that I've ever felt is feeling hopeless.."
He said, "well... sometimes, you cant really do anything chat."
I despised his answer.
I hate the fact that "my dream" just presented me with a harsh reality.
I was afraid that he was right... but he was.
And at this very moment, I am tempted to return to him.
Something that seems so beautiful...
Something that could take me far far away, at least for a moment...
But a dream is just a dream, no matter how painfully beautiful they are.
And at this very moment, I miss the comfort that he offered.
I long all the excitement that he brought.
He was my gateaway. He was my great distraction.
I whisper, hoping that he would hear, "Please take me away"
But I fail to see where he locates.
I do not hear his obnoxious but so damn precise answers.
But instead I can only find myself sitting here.
And at this very moment, I know... I am fighting alone.